A modern version of "Moby Dick"

"We, the Drowned" by Danish writer Carsten Jensen was just recently translated into English. It begins in 1849 and ends in 1945 just as WWII is coming to an end, and is centered around a small Danish sailing village, although a lot of it takes place at sea. With battles on the ocean, 2 world wars, cannibals, shrunken heads, foreign ports, mysterious women, love affairs, murderers, and epic journeys around the world, you'd think this book would be exciting. It's nearly 700 pages and split up into sections that are disconnected and seem to drag on and on, repeating the same stories of sailors going to sea and dying in a war or a storm that sinks their ship. The characters are completely flat and it's impossible to get invested in them; whenever a main character died, I didn't care. They lack personality and everything else that could make readers care about them.
     The worst part is, the very last section of the book including the ending is absolutely amazing. It's hard to believe that the incredible, beautiful end was written by the same person who wrote the rest of it. I kept thinking someone needs to chop off the last section and publish that separately, because then it would probably be one of my favorite books. But the other 550 pages are so tedious and redundant that, overall, this is one of the worst things I've read all year.

Don Delillo's "Cosmopolis"

Edgy, modern, and risqué, Delillo's novel has a unique style. It takes place mainly in the back of a limo making its way through Manhattan roughly during the course of one day. Eric Packer is a billionaire who encounters women that are just as sex-obsessed as he is, and everyone around him finds his charm (and money) irresistible. Except for one mentally-disturbed man who periodically cuts into the narrative with his manic, stream-of-consciousness ramblings and plots to kill Eric Packer. The limo Eric is riding in is super high tech and as they drive through the city they are constantly stalled by traffic jams caused by various unusual occurrences, so Eric jumps out of the limo several times to do whatever he feels like doing at the moment, and keeps running into his beautiful heiress wife. Throughout the course of the day he purposely makes poor investments, throwing more and more money away, which parallels the course of his downfall. Finally, he also purposely loses all his wife's money as well, to ensure his ruin. More strange occurrences and even stranger encounters bring the day-- and the novel-- to a close.
     I like the style of this novel, as well as its originality. It was interesting and ingenious, but not extremely exciting.
     The film adaptation of this book is in progress right now, so maybe you can wait and just see the movie. It's worth mentioning that Delillo has other novels that were critically acclaimed and very successful, including "White Noise." If his style sounds appealing to you but this book sounds a bit dull, try that novel.

"The Monsters of Templeton"

Lauren Groff needs to keep writing; this was her first novel and it's been successful with critics and readers. The story takes place in the fictional town of Templeton, where Willie Upton returns after having an affair with her professor, and then trying to run the professor's wife over with a small plane. Upon her return, a dead monster is discovered in the lake, bringing news crews and scientists to the town and leaving everyone totally baffled. In the midst of this, Willie's hippie mother decides to tell her that she's been lying all these years: Willie's father is not a hippie that her mother hooked up with once at a commune in California; he's a citizen of Templeton, and someone Willie knows. But that's as much as her mother will say, so Willie obsessively researches her family's history, going back to the founder of the town hundreds of years earlier, of whom she is a direct descendant.
     This story has tons of layers, twists, and lovable characters. Willie herself is flawed but endearing, and her interactions with her old high school classmates that she tries so hard to avoid are funny and memorable. Willie's mother is probably the best character, and adds a ton of humor, wit, and originality to the story. I appreciated the ending, which completely did justice to the rest of the novel. I hope Groff's next novel comes out soon.

Not Recommended: "Imperial Bedrooms"

"Imperial Bedrooms" by Bret Easton Ellis is worthless. From a writer's standpoint, it's poorly written, purely plot-driven, shallow, soulless, and completely banks on shock value. From a reader's standpoint, it was mildly entertaining but fell flat, and was mostly just disgusting. The narrative follows a screenwriter from LA named Clay who's hedonistic and self-involved. He is constantly having sex with random young girls (and sometimes young boys, too) by promising them that he can get them roles in movies, and of course he never follows through. Then he finds out his long-time best friend, a guy named Julian who works as a pimp, is dating the girl Clay has been pursuing. So Clay does what any normal person would do: he drops Julian off with a violent killer to be murdered. Then he rents a house out in the desert where he spends days violently raping and torturing a young girl and young boy, until the boy turns evil and the girl goes out of her mind. The entire book is completely devoid of emotion, and Clay lacks remorse for everything he does, discussing these horrific acts the way a person would talk about going grocery shopping. But the cold-hearted, detestable main character didn't bother me as much as the bad writing. Don't waste your time with this one.